Of Two Minds

{Digital Images manipulated in Adobe Photoshop}

From the Archives: The Man of Colour

This is what happens when I'm still very connected to an aspect of my personality that has outlived its usefulness: mental dysphoria and emotional dissonance.  This emotional state is very akin to what I was experiencing in the Blue Man drawing, but not quite as much dismay and depression.  That was very active, whereas this piece feels more static and reflective.

This also seems to be the state that precedes an emotional rebirth for me...a shedding of the skin of personality.  It is often a period of confusion as it is difficult many times to tell the difference between what is no longer functional and what needs to stay in my life.  The pull of the new versus the pull of the past.  Tearing apart with me in between.  Although worth it in the long run, during these times I often feel very lost.  This separation, it is the price of the Alchemy of spirit.

{Created in Photoshop}

From the Archives: Nightscape

A little Van Gogh tribute, but also a tribute to nighttime.    The moon has always been a powerful force in my life.  It does govern the tides...and we are made up of a good bit of water.  :-)  In the end, this is mostly just a sketch, but I feel it captures the FEELING of night, which was my goal.

This could be pushed much further, but other projects demand my attention right now.  Another for the "make this better later" pile.  This was done also around the time I discovered the paintbrush goodness in Photoshop. 

{created in Photoshop}

From the Archives: Green Man

Just in time for Summer!  Part of this is me exploring the paintbrush options in Photoshop.  However I've always been attracted to images of the Green Man, but have never explored them much in my own work.  I've always enjoyed the stylized pieces of leafy faces.  I just realized this looks a bit like Grizzly Adams as a Tree Spirit!  :-)

In my personal experiences of the Green man energy it seems as though there is a bit of a connection to the story of Sir Gawain and the Green Knight.  Two opposing masculine forces that dominate opposing ends of the year.  Here is a previous piece I did involving that theme.  I have recently been studying that same relationship through the cycling between Geburah and Chesed in The Kabbalah.

The piece itself is okay, but I feel like it is more of a sketch than anything else.  I'll explore more of this theme / image later.  Perhaps a full figure piece and/or a landscape.
{Created in Photoshop}

From The Archives: Bliss

This is me having an ecstatic moment in my studio.  Sometimes art really does it for me.  Or it could have been that my blood sugar dropped too low...or too high...or something blood sugary.    :-P

This was actually a wonderful feeling of connection to an energy system outside myself.  It was like I had downloaded bliss by accident.  A feeling of boundless energy and happiness and hope.  Sounds pretty cheesy hunh?  It actually felt like flying while I was sitting still.  I have only repeated this feeling a couple of times, usually involving some type of sensory immersion or deprivation with the proper music.  If I could live in this state I would.  It was the best coffee drink I've ever had combined with an orgasm combined with a slight feeling of free fall.  Mind you, none of those things were occuring when this image was being created.

It hasn't happened in a while.  I've never tried to manufacture it...perhaps THERE is a project.  However, I am a little afraid of it because of HOW good it feels.  Hmmm.....note here: light passing through a prism creates rainbows.  I guess the message here would be to work on my clarity.  Mentally clean house.  I guess I'm on the right track then.  That is what I have been doing ALL YEAR.

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

From the Archives: Rainbow Spirit Child

Here is something I found on the way to a mandala.  Some strange other dimensional rainbow child.  It's weird when you're working on something and look up at the screen and realize that it is looking back at you.  EEP!  However, it was more being startled than being afraid.  The feeling I get here is one of innocent interest and curiosity.  Around this time I did this piece a strange philosophy began to take over my Mandalas.  I began using the Mandala process as a way of viewing problematic situations in my life.   The repetition and changing angles began to become a way of looking at situations until there was a greater understanding, symmetry, and beauty.  When you start looking at situations from every angle possible, existence becomes a giant unfolding flower.  Who Knew?

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

The Black Heart

I was obsessed for awhile with the symbolic idea of the "Black Heart".

My question was: What would turn a Heart Black?

Flame I think...VERY HOT Flame.

All apologies to the Black Heart of the Feri Tradition,

which I did not discover until later.

I must investigate that visually at some point.  :-)

{Image 1: Created in Photoshop.

Image 2:  Digital images manipulated in Photoshop.}

Begin Again

When I was working on this one,

I was in a place of endings,

trying to get back on that damned horse!

{created in Photoshop.}

2 Scarabs Mandala

I decided to some digging and make sure

that I'd posted everything I'd been working on recently.

I discovered that I've missed alot over the past years.

So this is the beginning of me catching up.

{Digital Images manipulated in Photoshop.}

Sacrifice

This image popped up in and my head one evening

and demanded to be created immediately.

Sadly after that it sat and sat and nothing

more came of it. Here is the sketch anyway.

Hopefully one day there will be more.

{Digital images manipulated in Adobe Photoshop.}