Festival of Orgone: Merkabah

Working within its physical host, the self-angel now strives to bring the elements of the physical realm into balance and heal the wounds that created a separation from the understanding of Orgone.  From the Orgone Caves it loads the regenerative and transformative traits of the Scarab.  Using the Scarab's abilities, it transforms the more volatile elements into more useful and balanced energies.  The self-angel then uses the traits of the frog to call forth waters to cool flaring tempers and to heal distant wounds.

I will be called a madman because we do not understand what is happening.

Sometimes you get really far out on the tree limb and you aren't sure if it is going to support your weight.  I've been doing a lot of that for the past two years more out of necessity than anything else.  It was either take some chances or wither to death slowly in the life I was leading.  If I am crazy, I'd rather be honest about what is in my heart than cover it up with some fabrication:

I have enormous scary thoughts that threaten to swallow myself and others.

I see people as minefields and make it my job to see through them because I have trust and control issues and am very easily damaged by the wayward words of others.  

I'm afraid of large crowds because it is easy for me to lose my sense of self and therefore lose control of the beast I call "me".

It Comes Through

This thing is big,
I open myself to let it through.
I peel back like a glove,
like a the skin of an orange.
I thought myself dead
in this transformation,
but I am prologue
to the things that come through me.
I am the lantern
and the light comes
and the light comes through me.
I am just the first word.
I am just the match.
I am just a doorway.
I am just a window
and the light comes through.

Invocation

I open myself.
I open myself.
I open myself.
I become cloud and lightning.
I become the doorway and the bridge.
Me becomes Not-Me

and the bridge flares bright with the fire of heaven.

The veil of me spreads like shimmering water.
My skin is taught with the entrance of the Other
as my mind shatters into mirror vapor.
I aim myself into the gap
and refract like lantern light in a funhouse.
There is a sound like bagpipes warming up,
like a distant airplane passing.
Transfixed in this endless moment
I watch the world swallow itself.

{Digital Images manipulated in Photoshop}