I will be called a madman because we do not understand what is happening.

Sometimes you get really far out on the tree limb and you aren't sure if it is going to support your weight.  I've been doing a lot of that for the past two years more out of necessity than anything else.  It was either take some chances or wither to death slowly in the life I was leading.  If I am crazy, I'd rather be honest about what is in my heart than cover it up with some fabrication:

I have enormous scary thoughts that threaten to swallow myself and others.

I see people as minefields and make it my job to see through them because I have trust and control issues and am very easily damaged by the wayward words of others.  

I'm afraid of large crowds because it is easy for me to lose my sense of self and therefore lose control of the beast I call "me".

The Whole of My Heurt

The Heart is a wound that never stops bleeding,
but it is this very wound that keeps us alive.

Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel

This piece represents the presence of your internal personal guiding force within coming forward to say hello, or to make your brain explode with insights, visions, memories, emotions.  This is my recognition and interaction with my internal silent witness.  This piece and the one following in my next post are very similar, but they both took on  distinct visions so I decided to keep them separate.  They were both created from the same source material. 

I've felt this force in my life several times.  Its presence is always overwhelming and energetic.  It always seems to show up when I am writing or drawing...a time when I am not thinking of myself at all, when I am lost in the creative process.  I can sometimes tell it is coming before it shows up.  Like the tide coming in or the Moon growing fuller.

I cannot profess to have had the specific experience of  The Knowledge and Conversation of the Holy Guardian Angel , but my experiences seem similar.  Regardless, this piece is about that idea and process.  More information may be found at Thelemapedia.

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

From the Archives: Tiger Me

The year I created this, the Tiger had begun appearing as totem for me.  In an attempt to understand this energy, I incorporated it into my artwork.  This is an example.

I had a strange dream at the time of a Tiger leaping and each of its leaps were a dramatic change in my life.  The last leap involved leaping into another man's yard where the Tiger turned into a tabby cat.  I had the impression that he was my lover.  Which was odd at the time as I was single.

The Tiger is generally a solitary animal and they hunt silently.  One of many totems telling me to keep my big mouth shut.  LOL.  The others are Owl and Leopard.  Also not the only totem to tell me to work in darkness.  I wasn't aware previously of their fondness for water....seeing them swimming is a strange and wonderful thing.

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop}

Winter from the Archives

Me as a snow elf.  MANY moons past.

This was going to be a x-mas card.

{Digital images manipulated in Photoshop.}